this slope is treacherous
I texted him telling him how I felt. I was honest and as kind as I could be. His reaction? Not a nice one. As much as I wish not, I think our friendship is beyond repair… I can’t wait until I can leave this town…..
My Facebook status today after my final exam: Finished with my freshmen year in college. What’s cool is the fact that my teachers growing up didn’t think I could do it; I was in the “slow” classes, I wasn’t smart enough, not good enough, and too shy to be successful. Now I can say that I successfully graduated from high school, finished my first year in college with...
After my attempted suicide, he told me he wouldn’t know what he’d do without me if it had worked.. Now that I’m still alive, he knows very well what he can and does do without me… Glad I really didn’t mean much to you.. You make keeping my promises so difficult..
182.5/300 with a 37.5 curve included for my personal finance exam. Stats exam didn’t go too well. I forgot a few things so I know I got some wrong. However, I still think I got about an 80 on it, I’m hoping so anyways. One more exam tomorrow for interpersonal communication.
Exam week.. And in order to get a B in my personal finance class, I need to get a 286/300. Honestly, I’ve never done anywhere near that well on a normal test, and he curves all of them… Joy. Trig and stats I feel pretty comfortable with thankfully. Interpersonal communication I have yet to even look at and I have to give a 5 minute speech about the book on Wednesday. Should be...
I hurt so much today.. Not physically but hopelessly.. My heart hurts.. I really just need a hug.. Maybe someone just to hold me while I cry… Yeah.. It’d be nice to have some friends….
I started with $83, ended the evening with $31.48. Net loss of $51.52. $19 of which was spent playing bingo tonight. Money goes fast there. I don’t intend on going back anytime soon.
Well.. I’ll be home later than 2am. My ride’s friend decided she wanted to gamble more. Then my ride decided to. While waiting for them I gambled some and I did terrible. I still have yet to count my losses, I’m dreading that…
My shoulder is still sore, no workout tonight unfortunately.. Went to school at 8 for some stats tutoring until 12. From 12-2 I had tutoring for trig (along with some pizza for lunch) I called off work today for some study time. I talked to a friend of mine from tutoring for 45 minutes until our meeting at 3 to 4 From 4-6 we went out to Walmart to give me a break from school. Went to...
Weight training on hold
I went to physical therapy today and I couldn’t even get through my normal workouts without cringing in pain. My shoulder from the fall down the stair a couple months back still hasn’t healed properly. It still hurts so as much as I’d rather not, it’s probably in my best interest to pass up a day or two of my workouts until I know what’s up… :/ Resume from day...
Workout day 10
Well.. At school from 8-7:30. I forgot I had to bake for tomorrow, up until 9:45. I didn’t have to work out, could have easily skipped, but of coarse I’d feel bad not so I did. I didn’t wear my ankle weights tonight. I did it slightly out of order of my usual which could have caused this but plank 1: 1min 40 sec., plank 2: 1 min, plank 3: 1 min. I did three planks because of...
Plank 1: 100 seconds Plank 2: 67 seconds I tried something new tonight. After counting out my first plank, I three my timer on, started a song over and held until I couldn’t anymore. I think I could have held longer but my feet slipped out of place.. The disadvantage of this workout… I might to start doing that and are how that works.. If I continue to progress without seeing the...
I hate feeling as if I’m dumb. Most people here at the school make me feel like I am.. I didn’t finish my trig test, okay. Got over it.. Next tutoring session, didn’t understand anything so I didn’t help much. My next session I asked for help as much as I didn’t want to. After that I understood, however, she was too impatient for my answer to her question so she asked...
Work out day 8
I got to 90 seconds my first plank and 75 seconds my second. I started to do wall sits yesterday and today I was able (barely) to hold for 30 seconds. My side arm holds I started to hold while doing a weight for 15 reps and two sets each side. I’m not noticing much if any difference in doing these workouts, but hopefully if I persist, I will soon enough.
I don’t think I felt my heart break as much as it just did right now in such a long time….
Got to 75 on my first plank. Did 60 on my second which isn’t bad for me. Day six of my nightly workouts before bed.. Hopefully I’ll see results with a little more time.
After so long of just leaving me be, soon I’ll be able to show how strong I can be. Soon I will care less and less, until that less is none, then what? There’s love and there’s hate that they still give emotion, but once one just doesn’t care, they’re gone, you’ve lost them. Please don’t let me be gone, please don’t lose me, I’m falling hard...